I love that you spoke French as a child! And that your school included spoken French every day! How fabulous is that? And I totally get the intimidation of speaking with native speakers!
Seven years of Spanish, grades 7 through college freshman, did not prepare me for life in Spain. I could conjugate the heck out of a verb, but was intimidated speaking in public.
Living in Madrid we continued with our weekly, company-provided tutor, which helped, but mostly with understanding the Castellaño accent.
Traveling back to Spain with Ali her junior year, I was much more confident, (or carefree?) about it, and had no problem launching into questions or explanations, not caring if my tense was incorrect or I missed a word or two. She would not venture a peep, even though high school Spanish by this time, included daily conversation (but she was happy to correct me, after every encounter).
And then there was Italy last year. I thought I was prepared to speak basic Italian. I had done season 1 of Coffee Break Italian, had 24 pages of notes and, I thought, tons of confidence. And then I arrived, someone asked me something, and it was all downhill from there. Native language speakers talk so very fast! And I couldn’t think of the words! But I could answer in Spanish... for some reason that language kept pouring out of my mouth!
Thanks Patti...I so wish the early childhood French stuck for a longer time. Also, I have that same problem with the wrong language coming out of my mouth. Every time I go to Portugal, which for awhile I was alternating traveling to with France, French comes out. By the time I leave Portugal and am ready to go to France, my limited Portuguese comes out. Sigh.
I’ve been in the US for 27 years now and in the beginning I was super shy about speaking English because of my limited vocabulary and my heavy German accent. Over time, my vocabulary has grown, my accent has mellowed out a bit and I’m comfortable speaking English. But there are still times where my pronunciation is “off” and people have to ask what I mean. I’m used to it now but it took a while to get here.
Susi, I am so impressed that you have stuck with it. I can imagine it is only very rarely that someone doesn't understand you. It probably SEEMS like more often, since you remember it. I am still misunderstood in the US sometimes too, and I am a native speaker. There are so many regional accents though, that it is hard to be understood by everyone everywhere. The key always seems to be relaxed and not worry, but that is also the hardest thing sometimes!
I loved this post because I relate to so much of it, even the baguette confusion. After high school graduation, a group of students and teachers toured various European cities. At a campground somewhere in France, I was sent to the boulangerie to buy baguettes. Walking the five blocks to the place where I'd make my successful purchase, I practiced my order. I asked in perfectly rehearsed French for "five loaves of French bread." DUH! All loaves of bread in France are French but I wanted a baguette which at home we called French bread. Boy, was I embarrassed.
Last summer on a road trip through Asturias, in northern Spain, my husband and I scoured the menu in one of the best restaurants in town for vegetarian fare. Finally, we spotted a salad with tomatoes and goat cheese. Aha! The waiter brought us the salad with tomatoes and goat cheese but it was also piled with jamon, ham. After all, we are in Spain and what do you expect?
To the present, despite my decades of marriage to a Colombian, an extensive effort to perfect my language abilities, and two weekly Spanish classes with two different teachers and their high praises for my skills, I still get flustered, nervous, and forgetful when speaking to someone I don't know. It's for that same darn reason - judgement and thinking I'll make a fool of my myself in front of someone I don't even know. It's way past time to get over that! It does make me analyze the reasons for my insecurities and come up with calming or not caring techniques so I can relax into the situation.
I love your stories! And so relatable. And although I am not happy to hear you still get flustered speaking Spanish, it does comfort me somewhat as I know how fluent you are! As you say, we need to get over this fear of judgement, and work on those strategies for not caring! (PS., it was great to talk writing with you yesterday!)
I tried brushing up my rusty A-level French during lockdown - I made some progress, but there's no way I could hold my own in conversation. I'd neglected my French in favour of German at university, but I wish I'd kept it a place at the table!
I think learning a language any time is difficult, and I have never ending awe for my friends who speak more than one, comfortably. I seem to recall you have studied(?) in Germany and have used your knowledge of it in at least one of your essays I have read. I love how the German language puts together many words into one!
Even my German's rusty now, though! I do still read German books and websites, and listen to a podcast every now and again. I had been fortunate to get to a stage with the language that it had become a part of me, if you see what I mean. If only I'd got THAT far with French - I'd have something to build on. Oh well! I don't really travel abroad any more, anyway, so no matter!
I guess even if we don't travel, listening to and practicing speaking is another way to keep our perspectives open to consider other points of view. That is one of the treats of learning another language-it is so reflective of the culture and such a wonderful way to experience it. Enjoy your weekend Rebecca!
I had a similar experience where some buried French words burst forth at just the right moment! My husband and I went to a crowded bistro, and were seated at a very tiny table right in the middle of a busy aisle. My not-so-small husband madly shook his head "no," and looked for me to fix the problem. The only thing I could think of was to look at the table, then at my husband, then say "But he is a BIG man!" Not particularly articulate, but enough to get my dilemma across, and we were quickly seated someplace where we wouldn't be in everyone's way!
Thanks for your comment and that's a great story Linda! It's funny when our frustration equals more than our shyness or ability and then we can take action. Best of all when we can surprise ourselves! I'm guessing the food was worth the initial frustration. xx
Thanks Prue, but honestly, living in Lyon is probably the easiest place in France to live if you don't speak French very well. There is a large young population that speaks English fluently, plus Lyon has a large medical research presence in the Universities, research labs, and commercial research companies, contributing to a revolving population who speak English as the common language. We met people from all over the world and we always spoke English with them. Oh well!
I love that you spoke French as a child! And that your school included spoken French every day! How fabulous is that? And I totally get the intimidation of speaking with native speakers!
Seven years of Spanish, grades 7 through college freshman, did not prepare me for life in Spain. I could conjugate the heck out of a verb, but was intimidated speaking in public.
Living in Madrid we continued with our weekly, company-provided tutor, which helped, but mostly with understanding the Castellaño accent.
Traveling back to Spain with Ali her junior year, I was much more confident, (or carefree?) about it, and had no problem launching into questions or explanations, not caring if my tense was incorrect or I missed a word or two. She would not venture a peep, even though high school Spanish by this time, included daily conversation (but she was happy to correct me, after every encounter).
And then there was Italy last year. I thought I was prepared to speak basic Italian. I had done season 1 of Coffee Break Italian, had 24 pages of notes and, I thought, tons of confidence. And then I arrived, someone asked me something, and it was all downhill from there. Native language speakers talk so very fast! And I couldn’t think of the words! But I could answer in Spanish... for some reason that language kept pouring out of my mouth!
Thanks Patti...I so wish the early childhood French stuck for a longer time. Also, I have that same problem with the wrong language coming out of my mouth. Every time I go to Portugal, which for awhile I was alternating traveling to with France, French comes out. By the time I leave Portugal and am ready to go to France, my limited Portuguese comes out. Sigh.
I’ve been in the US for 27 years now and in the beginning I was super shy about speaking English because of my limited vocabulary and my heavy German accent. Over time, my vocabulary has grown, my accent has mellowed out a bit and I’m comfortable speaking English. But there are still times where my pronunciation is “off” and people have to ask what I mean. I’m used to it now but it took a while to get here.
Susi, I am so impressed that you have stuck with it. I can imagine it is only very rarely that someone doesn't understand you. It probably SEEMS like more often, since you remember it. I am still misunderstood in the US sometimes too, and I am a native speaker. There are so many regional accents though, that it is hard to be understood by everyone everywhere. The key always seems to be relaxed and not worry, but that is also the hardest thing sometimes!
I loved this post because I relate to so much of it, even the baguette confusion. After high school graduation, a group of students and teachers toured various European cities. At a campground somewhere in France, I was sent to the boulangerie to buy baguettes. Walking the five blocks to the place where I'd make my successful purchase, I practiced my order. I asked in perfectly rehearsed French for "five loaves of French bread." DUH! All loaves of bread in France are French but I wanted a baguette which at home we called French bread. Boy, was I embarrassed.
Last summer on a road trip through Asturias, in northern Spain, my husband and I scoured the menu in one of the best restaurants in town for vegetarian fare. Finally, we spotted a salad with tomatoes and goat cheese. Aha! The waiter brought us the salad with tomatoes and goat cheese but it was also piled with jamon, ham. After all, we are in Spain and what do you expect?
To the present, despite my decades of marriage to a Colombian, an extensive effort to perfect my language abilities, and two weekly Spanish classes with two different teachers and their high praises for my skills, I still get flustered, nervous, and forgetful when speaking to someone I don't know. It's for that same darn reason - judgement and thinking I'll make a fool of my myself in front of someone I don't even know. It's way past time to get over that! It does make me analyze the reasons for my insecurities and come up with calming or not caring techniques so I can relax into the situation.
I love your stories! And so relatable. And although I am not happy to hear you still get flustered speaking Spanish, it does comfort me somewhat as I know how fluent you are! As you say, we need to get over this fear of judgement, and work on those strategies for not caring! (PS., it was great to talk writing with you yesterday!)
Great post, Sabrina!
I tried brushing up my rusty A-level French during lockdown - I made some progress, but there's no way I could hold my own in conversation. I'd neglected my French in favour of German at university, but I wish I'd kept it a place at the table!
I think learning a language any time is difficult, and I have never ending awe for my friends who speak more than one, comfortably. I seem to recall you have studied(?) in Germany and have used your knowledge of it in at least one of your essays I have read. I love how the German language puts together many words into one!
Even my German's rusty now, though! I do still read German books and websites, and listen to a podcast every now and again. I had been fortunate to get to a stage with the language that it had become a part of me, if you see what I mean. If only I'd got THAT far with French - I'd have something to build on. Oh well! I don't really travel abroad any more, anyway, so no matter!
I guess even if we don't travel, listening to and practicing speaking is another way to keep our perspectives open to consider other points of view. That is one of the treats of learning another language-it is so reflective of the culture and such a wonderful way to experience it. Enjoy your weekend Rebecca!
Language and culture are so beautifully interdependent, aren't they? There's so much to explore in both!
Have a great weekend, too! 😊
I had a similar experience where some buried French words burst forth at just the right moment! My husband and I went to a crowded bistro, and were seated at a very tiny table right in the middle of a busy aisle. My not-so-small husband madly shook his head "no," and looked for me to fix the problem. The only thing I could think of was to look at the table, then at my husband, then say "But he is a BIG man!" Not particularly articulate, but enough to get my dilemma across, and we were quickly seated someplace where we wouldn't be in everyone's way!
Thanks for your comment and that's a great story Linda! It's funny when our frustration equals more than our shyness or ability and then we can take action. Best of all when we can surprise ourselves! I'm guessing the food was worth the initial frustration. xx
I have no second language so well done you, I say - particularly living in Lyon for a year and managing!
Thanks Prue, but honestly, living in Lyon is probably the easiest place in France to live if you don't speak French very well. There is a large young population that speaks English fluently, plus Lyon has a large medical research presence in the Universities, research labs, and commercial research companies, contributing to a revolving population who speak English as the common language. We met people from all over the world and we always spoke English with them. Oh well!