Oh my. Does this sound familiar - not only because of knowing your mother and her love of things, but because I am just starting that journey to rid myself of storage units… Where oh where does that 17th century desk go? Thanks for the guidance!
My heart goes out to you Anne. It is a journey, that is for sure. And even when you are ready to let it all go, it takes so much time and energy to find places for all of it. Best of luck with that, and let me know if you want to commiserate! ❤️
Learning from those who go before us... As trustee for my dear aunt, aka wealthy collector of many things, I was tasked with clearing out her two homes that were packed to the gills with lovely, expensive...KIPPLE! Although that was not the word that went through my mind over and over again as I filled black plastic bags to give away. Fortunately, the wonderful real estate person said she knew of an honest estate sale person who would take care of all of this for me. This saved my sanity, put money in the coffers for the other beneficiaries and gave me a new perspective on what I really valued in my life. Needless to say, after every trip to her home, I returned to MY home and edited those things not dearly loved. Things that had somehow landed on a shelf and stayed there, not really serving any purpose, For my kids' sake, I hope I have learned that valuable lesson!
Thanks for your comment! It really does sound like you worked hard and learned a lesson! And yes, like you, thinking of my kids has given me the motivation to keep culling a little bit, every year, and after every trip....
Boy, did I relate to this too. Fortunately, about seven years ago my mother and I with the help of an organizer cleared out her storage bin so when she died, we didn't have to face that too. After the storage bin cleansing, I was so proud of her for getting rid of stuff, most of which she didn't remember she had and which looked like some of the pictures in your post: balls, magazines, ripped lampshades, seat cushions for which there were no chairs.
Later, what was hard for me was sneaking stuff out of her apartment to the recycle or garbage bin without her noticing things that she'd forgotten about. I felt so sad and guilty throwing out her manila envelopes of her souvenir maps, menus, and postcards from her bicycle trip through Europe in 1953. Or blurry, water stained photographs of friends at a dinner party or my parents' trip to Korea. One time she came into the room where I was working with a handful of photographs she'd plucked out of the garbage bin down the hall, asking me why I was throwing them out.
I've sworn to myself we will NOT do that to our children. There will be minimal clean up after we go. Nonetheless, it will be an emotional time for them as it has been for all of us.
How wonderful that your mother was able to do so much of the cleaning out with you. What a gift. I'm sure she had some stories to tell as things made their way to the bins. I'd love to say I will get rid of most things before I go, but I don't think I will make that happen. I do feel confident though that my kids will not have 10 years of storage unit kipple to deal with when I leave. ❤️
When we held our estate sale (a year prior to actually selling the house) there was still a bunch of “stuff” left over. Perfectly good and useful stuff. Hugh was a little dismayed. My attitude was that, had we had a fire, NONE of this would make it onto an insurance claim list. So off it went to “a guy” who specialized in clearing stuff out.
Yesterday we cleared out a small storage area at the boatyard where our “summer home” KATIE MACK was restored. 5 years ago we had no idea what we might need of that stuff. Over the years we would pick up a few items, but this year we cleared out what we still wanted (it fit into 2 boxes!), tossed a bunch of stuff into the dumpster, and gave away the rest to the boatbuilders, their “boaty” tenants, and friends. Such a great feeling!
Next we returned to the larger storage unit that holds our furniture, artwork, etc. -- we didn’t sell it in the estate sale in 2016 because we had no idea how long we’d be aboard the boat. The smartest thing we did was make a list by box number of everything packed in boxes, so when we went to find children’s books to read to our granddaughter via Facetime, I knew to look for Box 55 (read aloud children’s books) as opposed to, say, Box 59 (boat books).
I’m sure when we move back “on the dirt” we’ll wonder why we kept some of the stuff -- do we really need our vinyl albums from the 60’s and 70’s? But at least we know what’s in all the boxes.
Oh those vinyls!!! Impossible to get rid of, for so many reasons. My son has been intermittently recording them for me and it is SUCH a treat to hear the scratchy sounds again of my beloved music. I'm happy to hear you have access to reading aloud books. That is the best reason to save those treasures! ❤️
Ouch. This certainly struck home. I'm afraid I'm an incorrigible packrat, a tendency made worse by the death of my wife eight-plus years ago; I threw a ton of stuff - furniture, art, papers (her college notebooks, for God's sake!) - into storage with the excuse that our three kids might want it some day. Well, all three kids are in their 30s now, and well launched into their adult lives (two are married and the third is about to be), and they don't have room for all that kipple even if they wanted it. I've moved five times (!) since Heather died, ostensibly paring down each time, but I still have way too much stuff. I'm not quite as bad as my father; when he died in 2018, he left behind - no lie - 700 kitchen knives, 100 neckties, 50 tweed jackets, several thousand books, several hundred LPs, etc. But I'm pretty bad. Sorry, kids!
I remember hearing about those 700 kitchen knives-it stunned me then and it still does today. Imagine! I can understand how you would want to save Heather's stuff for your kids. It will be up to them to decide, someday. It never stops, the purging. We have also gone through a few moves and we are still recycling so much stuff. Another collection of bags of kipple/treasure is off to the Charity shop tomorrow... ❤️
When I was in my early 20's I came across a book in a new-age bookshop, nominally about feng shui. (Amazon link: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Creating-Sacred-Space-Feng-Shui/dp/074991601X) On reading it, it became clear that 95% of the method was about decluttering and I resolved not to hoard things going forward.
To this day I have tried to keep my home clear of unwanted kipple. Despite my success at this, however, it has backfired. My partner has used up all the space with her own kipple, and I am forced into a tiny corner of her office to work in.
I didn't realise you were so good at being minimalist Martin! The space I see on the back of our zoom calls seems pretty clear and uncluttered, so you must have had some influence. I'm sorry to hear your practice has backfired. It is really challenging when one is minimalist and the other is not. Another exercise in patience for your more zen approach, I suppose! 😉
A beautiful post, Sabrina, which has warmed my heart and - I mean no offence, but just in consideration of my own overkibbled situation - chilled me to the bone!
Such a transformation from overpopulated Jenga pieces to space, space, space (both storage-, and breathing-)!
I’m deeply impressed. I loved reading the process you went through - it must have been heartbreaking and satisfying in equal measure.
Oh thank you so much Rebecca! Hug very gratefully accepted! I'm glad you enjoyed it and please don't let it chill you. I love to read about your treasures and they are sometimes the words that make me feel a bit sad about letting go of so many of mine. You have had the space to let them remain treasures, and haven't left them abandoned in a lonely space. You are in a much better place in that sense. Looking forward to reading your Saturday treat! ❤️
Oh my. Does this sound familiar - not only because of knowing your mother and her love of things, but because I am just starting that journey to rid myself of storage units… Where oh where does that 17th century desk go? Thanks for the guidance!
My heart goes out to you Anne. It is a journey, that is for sure. And even when you are ready to let it all go, it takes so much time and energy to find places for all of it. Best of luck with that, and let me know if you want to commiserate! ❤️
Learning from those who go before us... As trustee for my dear aunt, aka wealthy collector of many things, I was tasked with clearing out her two homes that were packed to the gills with lovely, expensive...KIPPLE! Although that was not the word that went through my mind over and over again as I filled black plastic bags to give away. Fortunately, the wonderful real estate person said she knew of an honest estate sale person who would take care of all of this for me. This saved my sanity, put money in the coffers for the other beneficiaries and gave me a new perspective on what I really valued in my life. Needless to say, after every trip to her home, I returned to MY home and edited those things not dearly loved. Things that had somehow landed on a shelf and stayed there, not really serving any purpose, For my kids' sake, I hope I have learned that valuable lesson!
Thanks for your comment! It really does sound like you worked hard and learned a lesson! And yes, like you, thinking of my kids has given me the motivation to keep culling a little bit, every year, and after every trip....
Boy, did I relate to this too. Fortunately, about seven years ago my mother and I with the help of an organizer cleared out her storage bin so when she died, we didn't have to face that too. After the storage bin cleansing, I was so proud of her for getting rid of stuff, most of which she didn't remember she had and which looked like some of the pictures in your post: balls, magazines, ripped lampshades, seat cushions for which there were no chairs.
Later, what was hard for me was sneaking stuff out of her apartment to the recycle or garbage bin without her noticing things that she'd forgotten about. I felt so sad and guilty throwing out her manila envelopes of her souvenir maps, menus, and postcards from her bicycle trip through Europe in 1953. Or blurry, water stained photographs of friends at a dinner party or my parents' trip to Korea. One time she came into the room where I was working with a handful of photographs she'd plucked out of the garbage bin down the hall, asking me why I was throwing them out.
I've sworn to myself we will NOT do that to our children. There will be minimal clean up after we go. Nonetheless, it will be an emotional time for them as it has been for all of us.
How wonderful that your mother was able to do so much of the cleaning out with you. What a gift. I'm sure she had some stories to tell as things made their way to the bins. I'd love to say I will get rid of most things before I go, but I don't think I will make that happen. I do feel confident though that my kids will not have 10 years of storage unit kipple to deal with when I leave. ❤️
I love this new term, Kipple.
When we held our estate sale (a year prior to actually selling the house) there was still a bunch of “stuff” left over. Perfectly good and useful stuff. Hugh was a little dismayed. My attitude was that, had we had a fire, NONE of this would make it onto an insurance claim list. So off it went to “a guy” who specialized in clearing stuff out.
Yesterday we cleared out a small storage area at the boatyard where our “summer home” KATIE MACK was restored. 5 years ago we had no idea what we might need of that stuff. Over the years we would pick up a few items, but this year we cleared out what we still wanted (it fit into 2 boxes!), tossed a bunch of stuff into the dumpster, and gave away the rest to the boatbuilders, their “boaty” tenants, and friends. Such a great feeling!
Next we returned to the larger storage unit that holds our furniture, artwork, etc. -- we didn’t sell it in the estate sale in 2016 because we had no idea how long we’d be aboard the boat. The smartest thing we did was make a list by box number of everything packed in boxes, so when we went to find children’s books to read to our granddaughter via Facetime, I knew to look for Box 55 (read aloud children’s books) as opposed to, say, Box 59 (boat books).
I’m sure when we move back “on the dirt” we’ll wonder why we kept some of the stuff -- do we really need our vinyl albums from the 60’s and 70’s? But at least we know what’s in all the boxes.
Oh those vinyls!!! Impossible to get rid of, for so many reasons. My son has been intermittently recording them for me and it is SUCH a treat to hear the scratchy sounds again of my beloved music. I'm happy to hear you have access to reading aloud books. That is the best reason to save those treasures! ❤️
Ouch. This certainly struck home. I'm afraid I'm an incorrigible packrat, a tendency made worse by the death of my wife eight-plus years ago; I threw a ton of stuff - furniture, art, papers (her college notebooks, for God's sake!) - into storage with the excuse that our three kids might want it some day. Well, all three kids are in their 30s now, and well launched into their adult lives (two are married and the third is about to be), and they don't have room for all that kipple even if they wanted it. I've moved five times (!) since Heather died, ostensibly paring down each time, but I still have way too much stuff. I'm not quite as bad as my father; when he died in 2018, he left behind - no lie - 700 kitchen knives, 100 neckties, 50 tweed jackets, several thousand books, several hundred LPs, etc. But I'm pretty bad. Sorry, kids!
I remember hearing about those 700 kitchen knives-it stunned me then and it still does today. Imagine! I can understand how you would want to save Heather's stuff for your kids. It will be up to them to decide, someday. It never stops, the purging. We have also gone through a few moves and we are still recycling so much stuff. Another collection of bags of kipple/treasure is off to the Charity shop tomorrow... ❤️
When I was in my early 20's I came across a book in a new-age bookshop, nominally about feng shui. (Amazon link: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Creating-Sacred-Space-Feng-Shui/dp/074991601X) On reading it, it became clear that 95% of the method was about decluttering and I resolved not to hoard things going forward.
To this day I have tried to keep my home clear of unwanted kipple. Despite my success at this, however, it has backfired. My partner has used up all the space with her own kipple, and I am forced into a tiny corner of her office to work in.
I didn't realise you were so good at being minimalist Martin! The space I see on the back of our zoom calls seems pretty clear and uncluttered, so you must have had some influence. I'm sorry to hear your practice has backfired. It is really challenging when one is minimalist and the other is not. Another exercise in patience for your more zen approach, I suppose! 😉
A beautiful post, Sabrina, which has warmed my heart and - I mean no offence, but just in consideration of my own overkibbled situation - chilled me to the bone!
Such a transformation from overpopulated Jenga pieces to space, space, space (both storage-, and breathing-)!
I’m deeply impressed. I loved reading the process you went through - it must have been heartbreaking and satisfying in equal measure.
A beautiful post. Please accept this hug: 🤗
Oh thank you so much Rebecca! Hug very gratefully accepted! I'm glad you enjoyed it and please don't let it chill you. I love to read about your treasures and they are sometimes the words that make me feel a bit sad about letting go of so many of mine. You have had the space to let them remain treasures, and haven't left them abandoned in a lonely space. You are in a much better place in that sense. Looking forward to reading your Saturday treat! ❤️
😊